Identity Reflection “Who do I think I am?” by Elizabeth Terpening
Identity Reflection “Who do I think I am?”
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By
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Elizabeth Terpening
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It is through my senses and spirit that I perceive the world, which in turn forms my identity. I enjoy so many things, like the sight of a sensual sunset or the sound of night critters chirping while the stars fill the night sky. I love to taste the fresh fruit plucked from our family orchard. I look forward to the feeling of warm soft mud in between my toes and the smell of fresh flowers blooming in my garden. I feel like my identity resembles a butterfly emerging out of its cocoon, even now in the middle of my life. As I stretch my wings and get ready to fly I am stopping to reflect on the past, present, and future to answer for myself the question of my identity, “Who do I think I am?”
Past; “Who have I been?”
I feel distant from the many roles I have played. I have carried these titles of daughter, friend, spirited worker, doer, laborer, learner, listener, looker, prayer, peace maker and positive cultivator, teacher, wife, mother, homemaker, and lover, but I do not see myself identifying closely with any particular past role. Even my spiritual connection seems to waver as I step into this new reality.
Present; “Who am I now?”
My character has remained the same but I am expanding my identity to encompass new choices and it requires a lot of personal work, time, and skill building. I am choosing to go back to college. I feel the need to connect my past experiences with my new desires to do more than live for myself and my family. It is an exciting adventure filled with wonders but these changes bring about an over whelming feeling of “Who am I, really?”
I have been humbled by life’s experiences. I am accepting of myself as well as others, which I believe makes me a well rounded being. I associate myself with the sprits of earth, animals, plants and other humans. I look for beauty in the world around me. I disassociate myself from evil and its negative energy because it only seems to undermine and damage the positive parts of my character. I wish never to abuse the gifts I have received from my creator. I feel the discomfort of change as I look into the future, but I am compelled to fly into the unknown.
Future; “Who do I want to be?”
I think I am “who I choose to be” and my identity is a reflection of my choices… I have been grounded by a profound understanding of my own character. I’ve come to a realization that my identity is always changing. I am now taking flight as my identity is marked and captured by the choices of my past. My present life is now expanded by my wings. My future identity is guided by my senses, attitudes, and understandings and it is free to carry me away…
