The Resilience Factor

Book Summary by: Jill Story

Book by: Karen Reivich

Andrew Shatte

The main points of the book.

The main point of the book is to increase a person’s resilience. Resilience is essential to success and happiness. Studies have indicated that resilience is made up of seven distinct abilities. Emotional regulation, impulse control, empathy, optimism, causal analysis, self-efficacy, and reaching out. In order to become more resilient you must change the way you think about adversity. How you respond to situations is called thinking style. Thinking style is like a lens through which we see the world. Everyone has a lens. It is how we interpret the world and respond to events. Your thinking style determines your level of resilience—your ability to overcome, and bounce back when adversity strikes. The goal of the book is to teach the reader the seven skills of resilience. The authors say that resilience is not a genetically born trait, like what color your eyes are. While some of us are born into circumstances that build resilience, most of us have to learn how to face adversity.

Give specific examples of the book that reflect these main points. And The strength of support for the points made

Four uses of resilience…“Most of us at some point experience a major setback, like job loss, divorce, death of a child, or parent. These are crises that take a toll on our resilience. And depending on our supplies of resilience, we will either become helpless and resigned, or we will bounce back and find a way to move forward. Some of us must apply our reserves of resilience to overcome the obstacles of childhood—a broken home, emotional or physical neglect. We need resilience to put behind us the damage that may have occurred in our youth and to take responsibility for creating the adulthood we want. And all of us need resilience to steer through the everyday adversities that we encounter such as: arguments with family and friends, disagreements with co-workers. Life is full of stress and hassles, but if we are resilient, we will not let daily trials and tribulations interfere with our well-being. Those of us whose goals are to find renewed meaning and purpose in life and is open to new experiences and challenges can apply resilience to reach out so that you are able to achieve all you are capable of.” p. 15

Everything that has happened to a person cannot be changed. This book can’t change the fact that you were born into poverty, or that your parents divorced. But it can teach you a process to overcome your childhood by stay motivated, productive, engaged, and happy even when facing stress at work or home. p. 19

The definition of people who are able to bounce back from setbacks. “They exhibit a task-oriented coping style—they take incremental, purposeful actions to deal with the adversity; as their actions show, they have a deeply held belief in their ability to bounce back more quickly from trauma know how to use their connections to others as a way to cope with their experience. p. 24

Childhood environmental factors—poverty, divorce, emotional and physical abuse, to name a few—are history. Beyond our ability to change. But beliefs can be changed and abilities can be boosted. This book is about to teach us the seven abilities: emotional regulation, impulse control, empathy, optimism, causal analysis, self-efficacy, and reaching out. These factors can be measured, taught, and improved. p. 33

The next part of the book has the reader take a resilience test that measures a person’s current standing on the seven abilities as well as their overall Resilience Quotient (RQ).

I took all of the tests and did very well on all but one of them.

Chapter three lays the groundwork for becoming resilient. The authors share four principles that their work is based on. The four research-driven pillars that provide the foundation for the skills of resilience: Pillar 1: Life change is possible, Pillar 2: Thinking is the key to boosting resilience, Pillar 3: Accurate thinking is the key, and Pillar 4: Refocus on the human strengths.  Resilience is about positive characteristics in a person’s emotional and psychological makeup. A lack of resilience is a major cause of negative functioning. Without resilience there is no bravery, no wisdom, and no insight. It is the foundation on which everything is built.

 Part II of the Book: Chapter Four through Nine  

Goes in depth about mastering the Seven Skills to become more resilient:

1. Learning your ABCs- teaches you how to listen to your self-talk, to identify what you are saying to yourself, and to understand how your thoughts affect your feelings and behaviors.
2. Avoid thinking traps- When something goes wrong, we analyze it. We come up with different conclusions on why it happened. The author goes in depth about eight different scenarios that challenge resilience. We jump to conclusions! We have tunnel vision! We magnify and minimize! We personalize, externalize and over generalize! We tend to mind read and reason emotionally.
3. Detecting icebergs- is a skill that will significantly improve relationships. The authors get you to identify your core beliefs. Ones that you don’t even realize you have and determine when they are working for you and when they are working against you.
4. Challenging beliefs- life change is possible. When I signed up for this class and was purchasing my text books I also purchased a book called What You Can Change…and What You Can’t*  by Martin E.P. Seligman *(learning to accept who you are) While I haven’t had the opportunity to read it just yet, I felt as if this chapter touched on this topic. Beliefs matter and if you have any doubts about your inability to change you will not allow yourself to grow. I am open to personal growth and change all the time. It’s whether or not I continue to practice and apply it.
5. Putting it in perspective- I don’t often have catastrophic events that happen in my life. But when I do, I often find myself waking at 3:00 a.m. unable to go back to sleep. This chapter helps me prepare to deal with such problems when they do arise.
6. Calming and focusing and Real-time resilience- is a powerful tool that helps one to quiet their emotions when they are out of control, to focus on your thoughts when they are intrusive, and to reduce the amount of stress. I think that some of the exercises that this chapter talks about it wonderful. I would have never thought about the ABC exercise to remove your mind from your internal thoughts. The breathing exercise I have been using, but not necessarily for stress. But, a great exercise for when you are experiencing such.

My personal conclusions after reading the book.

I think that this book has some really good ideas. I have never thought of my own resilience until reading this text. The authors statement “resilience is not a genetically born trait, like what color your eyes are. While some of us are born into circumstances that build resilience, most of us have to learn how to face adversity.”

I have to assume that through my personal life experiences, such as: adoption, growing up in a broken home, becoming independent at a young age made me who I am today. I am a very resilient person. I would have thought that I was resilient because of my genetic makeup not because of circumstances that I experienced.

I will conclude my paper on an adverse situation that I encountered and because of resilience I was able to overcome.

In January of 2003, I found out that my employer was closing the doors. After 12 years of working as a mechanic at the now defunct Miller/Pabst/Olympia Brewery I was going to be out of a job. Miller’s management gave a six month notice to about 400 employees that in June they would be out of a job.

Instead of allowing this life changing event affect me. I set out on a path of what I really wanted to do next. I spent the next six months researching jobs in demand. What was going to provide me a decent income. I called employers and spoke with employees; this is called an informational interview. People who love their jobs love talking about them. I talked with physical therapists, x-ray technicians, biomedical service technicians, and paralegals.

When I was in high school, I always wanted to be a State Patrol Trooper. I loved the law and after speaking with paralegals I decided that this was the path I would choose. I no longer wanted to be an officer. I had worked my share of shift work, weekends, and holidays. I wanted a job that was going to allow me to work Monday through Friday.

Paralegals and legal work was in demand so the Federal Retraining Act allowed me to go to school for this occupation. In the fall of 2003, I began school at South Puget Sound Community College (SPSCC) and in 2005; I graduated with an Associates of Technical Arts in Paralegal Studies.

This wasn’t an easy task, going back to school. I felt like I had lost a sense of who I was. It was extremely hard, but I persevered. I was very dedicated, this was my future! I think that this experience is a great example of being very resilient. At the time I experienced this hardship and overcame this adverse situation I wasn’t even aware that it was resiliency that was pulling me through it.

While attending school I volunteered at the Thurston County Prosecutor’s Office (TCPAO), which turned into a full-time job. I have been with TCPAO for almost four years now. Once I graduated from SPSCC I realized how important a higher education is. I checked into pursing a Bachelor’s degree at Evergreen and they had a program that fit my needs. Once I get a degree from Evergreen, who knows where I will go. Perhaps a masters or a law degree?