Interdisciplinary Psychology:

Three Blessings

Before I started this exercise, I recalled reading about it in Authentic Happiness in which Martin Seligman did this activity with his grandchildren. I thought I would have much the same results waking up feeling happy and ready for the day and I anticipated enjoying this activity.

Overall the exercise went well. I got the results I was expecting except for the first three days (which I will explain in more detail momentarily). I found myself experiencing an elevation in mood, and because I have a love of learning I was looking forward to sharing the experience with others.

As I mentioned, I did have an unexpected result from the optional assignment and I found I experienced the opposite of what was expected. When I took an event from the day and assigned it a word, saying that word to myself as I fell asleep, I found myself having vivid, nightmarish dreams that caused me to start the day tired. In order to stop having nightmares I stopped trying to dream about my daily events. I’m not exactly certain what the relationship between the trying to associate a word with sleeping has with me having nightmares but there were other stressors ongoing on these days as well which could have played a part in the fact that I had an experience contrary to what I expected.

In any case, after I stopped trying to dream and focused on the positive events I found the results I was expecting. I did wake up in a better mood and I felt more rested and ready to get out of bed. I found that I put down about the same amount of small things like eating a wonderful dinner or going for a walk as I did big things, like getting paid from work.

Taking the time to write down three good things that happened for the day made me more mindful of what others did for me. It was nice to recap the day and pick out the events that went well to reflect upon. I was able to have a more positive outlook about my days for this past week and that helped me find other things that were going well. I would like to continue this activity so even on rough days I can feel something positive has happened.

 

Gratitude Letter

I wanted to write my letter to my life partner. Being together for over 3 years, our life has settled in to a comfortable routine that makes it easy to forget to express my gratitude. Writing the letter was as good of an experience as reading it to him. I found I had a lot more things to be grateful for than what I put in the letter.

The following is the letter I read out loud to him:

Dear Jonathan,

I want to share my feelings with you to let you know how much I am grateful for you. This letter isn’t comprehensive, but it is a good start.

I am grateful for your strength. I can rely on you to always be there for me no matter the need. You have supported me in times where I had no strength of my own. I am especially grateful for your support after I had been fired from my job a year ago. I was depressed and ready to give up, without your support, life for me would be much different.

I am grateful for the little things you do to make me feel special. As an example, I carry around with me a little note you stuck on my lunch several months ago. I read it when I am feeling down or doubting myself. That little thing you did reminds me of your love for me.

I am grateful for your willingness to keep the house clean. While I am going to school and working I really appreciate your willingness to take up the responsibility to keep the house clean. I know you dislike cleaning which makes the act more meaningful. You allow me the ability to keep a balance between our relationship, school and work.

I am grateful that I can share my life with you. I had a dream to find a “best friend” that I could share my life with. You help me realize my dreams. You have helped me realize that a relationship was more then just friendship.

I am grateful for you.

Reading this letter was a wonderful experience. The week had been rough due to family and work and an emotional boost was needed. We both felt really good while I was reading and as soon as I finished he started enumerating what he was grateful for about me.