I had a real fun time with “The Wedding Banquet.” I loved the interplay between various cultural traditions, and the push and pull of acculturating to the United States versus being a good Chinese child and honoring your parents.

I’m aware that for this post we were asked to discuss the reasons of Khan having Aspergers Syndrome. In class I mentioned that it was probably to make the discrimination against Muslims and Middle Easterns/Indian appearing persons more relatable to the audience by showing how prejudice people treat those they are discrimanting against. In the opening scene with Khan in the room with TSA agents not only sets the stage for the film but was one of the more powerful scenes in the film. They way the Agents treat Khan because they suspect him of being a terrorist vs how they treat when they find his card saying that he has Aspergers is very similar and if anything becomes worse when they think that Khan doesn’t really grasp what they are saying/doing to him. That’s why when he says, “My name is Khan, and I’m not a terrorist” point blank to their questioning it disproves that he is incompetent in understanding the situation both of his being targeted as a terrorist and then being mocked. I knew I’d like the film after that one part, but in reality I love it, except for one thing.

Previously to this film I’ve watched “Forest Gump” and “What’s  Eating Gilbert Grape” (Because I have a thing for Johnny, except I’m mad at him right now for “The Lone Ranger”). In both the films and also in “My Name Is Khan”, I’ve felt very uncomfortable with the roles played by Tom Hanks, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Shah Rukh Kahn because they were acting at having born with differently able characteristics. Now I do understand that acting is a skill and an art, but by having able persons playing these roles not only further marginalizes those individuals, it says that people who do identify that way can’t be act and it says that it’s okay to make these very real and very personal identities into a costume. And how are this roles different from Yellow Face, Black Face, Red Face, or Brown Face? I appreciate that this roles do put differently able persons into the mass media scope, but why not go further and find someone who actually is differently able and is acting to play those roles? It’s the same beef I have with Jared Leto for playing and winning an Oscars for his role in “Dallas Buyers Club”, in which he played a Trans* woman, when I know for a fact that there are open Trans* actresses that could have played that role (here’s an article on some of them).

(Content Warning for racial slurs)

I’m in the firm belief that identities you are born with should not be played by people outside of them. Some might ask why then it’s okay then to have gay people play straight roles, Trans* women playing just women roles, etc. and because this post is happening after reading A Tale For The Time Being, I have two responses. First is that these iditities are oppresssed so if people don’t feel safe being open about them in a n environment where others are playing their idetities way should they not play them? But something that Ruth said really struck home with me. Maybe you remember on page 32 when Oliver is telling Ruth that it’s not far that she can use the word “Jap” and he can’t, but her response of, “Exactly. It wasn’t fair” really sums up my feelings on that.

“We should not forget our roots, our culture, our tradition, our regards.”

I loved this movie. Initially, one thing that stuck out to me was the fact that after the Indian’s were forced to leave from Uganda because there citizenship was taken away yet, they kept their culture although they had moved to Mississippi. This reminded me of how America is supposed to be such a huge melting pot, and the importance of always remembering where we came from. Moreover, I was reminded of last quarter and how we discussed Japanese Americans and how much of a struggle it was for the newer generations to really keep traditional values and how they tried to restore their Japanese culture by embracing both American and Japanese cultures and intertwining them to make up another third culture. I thought it was key for the Indian’s to be able to keep their culture especially within the southern part of America where racism was prominent during this time period. It said something about the culture itself because a lot of cultures are lost once they come to America and end up confining to American/western culture.

Also, I thought it was interesting to see how quickly Demitrius’ family welcomed Mina into their home. As opposed to Mina’s family did not respect her dating a black American male although they all share the same commonality of having brown skin. It was evident that Mina’s mother wanted her to find someone to fall in love with and throughout the film she was pushing her to date within their own race, however, Mina breaks tradition by falling in love with a black American man.

In addition, there were multiple stereotypes throughout the film, for instance, in the beginning Tyrone assumed that Mina was Mexican because of her brown skin and long blackish hair. Moreover, after the car accident, one would assume that the police officer on the way to the scene was going to be a white male, yet he was actually a black male. It was surprising considering it was the south where racism was prominent. Another stereotype was when one of the Indian men went to talk to Demitrius about the accident, he states: “Your people are very good at sports” but then eventually goes on to saying “Black, brown, yellow, Mexican, Puerto Rican are all the same as long as you’re not white means you are colored.” Then they start talking about how all people of color have to stick together…”United we stand, divided we fall” reminds me of the end of the film where the Indian guys go to the motel and see his truck and walk in on Mina, the same guy tells one of them to get the cops, basically contradicting what he had discussed with Demitrius in an earlier scene…so much for “All us people of color must stick together”…just because he found out that one of his people (Mina) was sleeping with a black man.

“How’s the lawsuit, those niggas pay up yet?”

This quote struck out to me because it reminded me of the concept of internalized oppression because it was a black man who made this statement. This seemed to be degrading himself and his race considering he was black as well. This brings me further on to thinking about todays issues on derogatory terms such as the “n” word and how a larger amount of blacks have come to grips with identifying with the word and using it as a sense of pride. Furthermore, this also reminds me of how blacks and other races are sort of dividing themselves today with the concept of “light skins” and “dark skins”…why do we have to have a divider? Aren’t we all brown skin anyway? How do we make change without solidarity?

The term Mina used to describe herself as “Mixed Masala” reminded me of last quarter’s program and the discussions we had about the “mix plate” and also the film titled “Doubles: Japan & America’s Intercultural”. I liked how she described herself with this term, with the actual meaning referring to a bunch of hot spices. This showed she embraced all of herself and her variety of cultures by identifying with being Indian, growing up partially in Uganda, moving the England and then finally found her way to America.

“All you’ve done is bring such shame on our heads”

I feel this has been a quote stated in many of the films we have watched this quarter and even last quarter as well. We see the struggle with keeping ones traditional/family values as a theme throughout the quarter. The generation gap between Mina and her parents is clear especially at this part of the movie. However, Mina makes a statement by saying “This is America, no one cares” referring to the fact that she is in love with a black man who is not from the same culture or the same race as her. Yet, she still is strong enough to make the statement of doing what is best for her at the end of the day as a form of resistance.

“Struggle…I’m a black man born and raised in Mississippi, ain’t a damn thing you can tell me about struggle.”

I felt this was one of the most powerful quotes in the movie and I thought Mina’s father realized how he and his family excluded themselves from being a person of color once they got to America. Especially, since they had moved from Uganda, an African country that was filled with mostly blacks. But because he held the grudge of having to leave and that his black African friend told him that he was not black and that Uganda was for black Africans. Unfortunately, he struggled with accepting this, however, after Demitrius said this to him, he was lost with words to say and eventually came to grips with his struggle.

The theme of death in this book was everywhere.  In the first few pages of the book Nao told her reader, “I’m telling you this because I’m actually not going to be around for long, and you might as well know this up front so you don’t make assumptions.” (pg. 6)  With Nao always talking about how she was going to “exit my existence” (pg. 7) and her dad trying to kill himself every two seconds, and the cat getting attacked, death was very prevalent.

In Nao’s case I think that she thought that death was just the best thing to do.  She was so matter-of-fact about it.  Her life was ridiculously difficult and stressful.  And at her age, she really needed some role models in her life, and she had them.  But unfortunately, they were just confirming the idea that she should end herself,  because that’s all she saw.  Her dad, we later found out, was full of shame, and thought that his family would be better off without him.

In Jiko’s case, Ozeki made sure to make her death meaningful.  Nao and her father saw that Jiko lived as much as she could.  She did everything in her power to live life the way she believed it should be lived.  Death is a part of life, but it’s not the answer to everything.  Thankfully, Nao and her father finally saw that.  Even if it did take a little magic.

Another really important theme of this book was communication.  Nao was communicating to Ruth through her diary that was written almost ten years before Ruth found it.  And it didn’t matter.  They still felt connected whether it was because they personally believed they were connected in the past and future and present, or whether because they were connected.  Ruth was meant to find the diary.  It wasn’t just by chance.

Nao’s communication was through her diary.  She also communicated with her Old Jiko through computer and text.  Another form of communication was the lack of communication between her and her parents.  All of these ways of communication both added to her difficulties, or helped her in some way.  There is no doubt that meeting Jiko helped her.  The summer she spent with her, was a way of healing her, as well as showing her that she could be strong even when she didn’t feel strong.

As for the ways of magic communication, Ruth communicated with Nao’s father in her dream, which in turn led him to go to Nao at Jiko’s death and funeral.  He then went on to communicate with Nao, and they finally were able to connect and understand each other a little more.  Just enough to make them reconsider their decision to end their lives.

I think that all of the communication and lack of communication throughout this novel played a key role in what would happen to Ruth, Nao and her father.

I think that one of the major themes of this book was healing.  Emotional healing.  Nao, her dad, and Ruth all were dealing with personal issues throughout this book.  Nao, as a way to cope with her dysfunctional situation, started writing in a diary.  She didn’t know whether or not it was going to do any good, but she still continued.  She finished what she started.  In Ruth’s case, she found the diary, and something inside her knew that it wasn’t just an ordinary diary.  She felt that she had to read it, and in the process of respecting Nao’s diary, and reading it, she learned about herself as well.

This book did incorporate some magical elements.  I don’t think it really matters how the healing came about to the characters because I personally believe that some things can’t be explained.  And these people needed serious help, and however it happened, that help was given to them.  I think Ozeki actually gave us a clue in the beginning that this might be the case when Nao said, “You’re my kind of time being and together we’ll make magic!” (pg. 4)

The part that really showed how Nao and her father had both healed was when her dad said, “We must live Naoko! We have no choice. We must soldier on!” (pg. 369)